Fan or Fanatic? 5 Crazy Pieces of Fan Merchandise

I'm a pretty big fan of sports merchandise- within my eye line right now are three Braves bobbleheads, a Braves cup, a Georgia Tech blanket, and several Georgia Tech cups. I have jerseys for all my favorite soccer teams and other jerseys from places I've traveled. Most people would say that makes me pretty dedicated, but browsing through fan merchandise on the internet, I've realized that I'm far from that. Here are the five most ridiculous items I've seen.

1. Braves hot dog brander

http://www.ladyfanatics.com/MLB_Atlanta_Braves/Atlanta_Braves_Hot_Dog_BBQ_Brander

This would be a brilliant idea to have at the ballpark. If I went to Turner Field and got my hot dog and before putting ketchup on it I saw the Braves logo on it, I would say "wow, that's cool!" but then continue eating my hot dog like normal. But would I use this in my own kitchen? Would I want to take the time to brand my hot dogs before I eat them? Absolutely not. A complete waste of time and money.

2. Pooping Messi Figure

http://www.caganer.com/leo-messi-golden-ball-p-521.html?language=en

Apparently this goes along with a Catalan Christmas tradition called caganers which are little pooping figures that are put in nativity scenes. To the rest of the world, though, this is a little bit insane. I wouldn't walk into my team's shop and buy a figure of my favorite player bending over and taking a dump. There's really nothing else to say about this- the weirdness explains itself.

3. Team Tree Face Sculpture

http://www.ladyfanatics.com/COLLEGE_GA_Tech_Yellow_Jackets_Ladies/Georgia_Tech_Yellow_Jackets_Resin_Tree_Face_Ornament

I've seen these listed for multiple teams, and every time I see it I get a little bit more scared. Because is this not the creepiest thing you've ever seen? It's a face in a tree. And not just a normal face- a weird, white-lipped, big-eyed, creepy face. Just staring at anyone who comes into your yard. Maybe this would make a good scary Halloween decoration, or a good way to keep people out of your yard, but otherwise this is just weird.

4. Georgia Bulldogs Lip Gloss

http://www.footballfanatics.com/COLLEGE_Georgia_Bulldogs_Gameday_And_Tailgate/Georgia_Bulldogs_Glitter_Lip_Gloss_-_White

I know you've got to look cute for game day in Athens, but is this really necessary? Is this a big seller? Do people really want everything down to their lip gloss to be pure Georgia Bulldogs??? To make matters worse, it's glittery. Do people even wear glitter lip gloss anymore?

5. Any ladies merchandise that is animal print and/or pink

http://www.footballfanatics.com/MLB_Atlanta_Braves_Ladies/Majestic_Atlanta_Braves_Ladies_Fashion_Replica_Jersey_-_White_Pink

The most ridiculous thing I see, as a female fan in particular, is the amount of ladies fan merchandise that has some sort of animal print on it or completely disregards the team's colors for pink. Sure, that's fine if your team is the zebras and you want to wear zebra-print accented things. And pink is fine when it's supporting breast cancer awareness, don't get me wrong on that. But the idea that anything made for women has to be pink or has to be animal print to somehow be "fashionable" to be marketed to women is completely ridiculous. Women's fit items? No problem there, some ladies want that cut. But why would I want a pink Braves shirt? That's not their colors at all. If I'm going to support my team, I want to be wearing their colors. So please, every merchandise brand ever, enough with the pink! You can make cute things in team colors, I promise they'll sell.